When it finally came time for Dorothy to go home she found that the ability to do so had been with her the whole time, the power was with her. Long before Oprah, there was the ah-ha moment, and like Dorothy, I have just had one.
I just reminded myself of something, and I did it by re-reading my blog. In January I started a new chapter of my lifes journey. I detoxed and started eating only real food, I was exercising most days, and I felt so good. I had forgotten. In the 7 weeks since returning from our honeymoon I have slipped down a deep dark hole and become so disconnected from me. I have felt hopeless, sad, irritated, tired... the list goes on. What happened in Rarotonga was the catalyst, the trigger, but not the entire reason. I've been depressed before, in fact that's half the problem. I tell myself I 'should know better'. But, that's the thing with depression, the gap between what I know and how I feel.
I had a great chat to someone I barely know tonight. We talked about depression and diet and detoxing and eating real food. I gave her some advice, and in doing so, I gave myself some advice. My advice to me is to do what has worked before. I am now in pre-detox mode and soon, maybe starting on May 17, I will do a full detox and heal my body and mind and heart through nutrition, with side servings of exercise and therapy. Because it all starts and ends with me, it always has.
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